Sunday, February 16, 2014

Hope and Stay

It's been awhile - this space has been quiet - it needed time to rest.  After Emme's passing, there wasn't much to add.  But today, I want to try and add hope to this little blog and tell how much hope we have in our adoption journey.  This blog was started to chronicle the adoption journey of our family and to remember all the trials, joys and heartache that went along with that.  I needed to take a little time before moving forward here because I needed to just feel all that we were feeling.  Losing Emme was so very sad.  Tragic even.  The circumstances that surrounded her passing, leaving us ready to bring a child home, then leaving us empty, was very hard.  There were lots of questions.  Many we still don't have answers to and may never have answers to.  Some things we will never understand.  But we know that we fought for her - yes, we fought for Emme.  She will forever be a part of our hearts and family.  Her little picture rests next to her sister's and brother's pictures on my shelf and I see the very first image we had of her as I walk by.  It's the only one where she is sort of smiling.

I'm not sure how people without faith get through difficult times.  Without our faith, this would be so much harder.  Yet, we aren't walking this path alone! God's been with us this whole time and is holding us up through our trials.  He is our hope and stay.  He is writing this story, it's His story after all.  All the prayers of others has given us so much comfort. 

I bought this rose a day after Emme passed, and when it started to open, I had to capture it - I wanted to hold onto it's beauty in remembrance of her sweet spirit.  I thought she would touch many hearts when she came home, but in talking with others after they heard our news, it blew us away how many hearts she had touched and none of us ever met her.  Meeting her in Heaven one day, is going to bring me great joy.  The day I finally get to hold her.  We plan to plant a rose bush as soon as the weather warms up this Spring in her memory.

Our adoption journey isn't over, we still plan to adopt.  We just have a little extra time now.  God has been working out an amazing story, one we couldn't see before now.  Now we see it and it's awe-some.  There's another little girl waiting for us now and she's very special to us.  She deserves her own post - which I'll do a little later.  Hope, there's so much hope.  There's a verse that has been helping us get through that I'd like to share here.

In Romans 8:28, it says "and we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."  He loves us, sees us, and wants good for us.  So much hope in that.

And because there was a special Valentine's retreat (for parents only) this year which involved a concert featuring Stephen Curtis Chapman, I'm sharing this video.  A special song - because we know we will see you one day.

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